All I’ve been doing is catching up. I was a bad bad bad girl and didn’t write anything, not a single word on days 10, 12, 13 and 14. I completely slacked off. I kept telling myself I should be in the 30k range by now if I just wrote. But I didn’t. I had a few reasons, or excuses, whatever.
1. I didn’t really like how my story was going. Eva is kinda okay and fun but it’s like she’s being drifted away, like things are happening to her but she’s not making them happen. Like she’s observing her life. But then I had this ingenious thought of having her mother visit. The visit created conflict for my FMC and today I was able to write more than 3k words just exploring their relationship! The new character, who I never even thought about writing into my story, totally breathed new life into it.
2. It was the weekend then the holiday. I was out all day most of those days. And by the time I got home, I was too tired to write.
3. I am lazy. That’s not a reason, it’s an excuse. Whatever.
4. I needed someone to kick me in the butt. I got that kick in the butt in the form of an email from the OLL (Office of Letters and Light) that informed me that my novel and synopsis was picked to be in the pool for the 30 Days, 30 Covers thing. I was so happy. So I guess they will give my synopsis along with a thousand other more worthy ones to the designers and if mine gets picked (hopefully) then I could see a book cover with my name on it that I didn’t Photoshop! Woohoo!
But anyway, things are progressing albeit slowly in Eva’s world. Things are changing and happening and she still isn’t sure how to handle them or cope. Here’s an UNEDITED scene that iw rote today that I kinda liked. Sorry if it’s too long.
“Mother, did you like working at the bakery?”
Eloise was quiet for awhile, like she was thinking of what to say and how to word it just right. “I did. I guess. Pop paid me weekly wages so I could go out with my friends during weekends and buy a new pair of earrings or something silly like that. I liked watching Ma bake and she would teach me. But I was never like you, Eva. I could tell Ma enjoyed teaching you. She stopped teaching me when I got older. Got more interested in boys and clothes. But you… your eyes literally lit up when you saw the kitchen in this house. You were only five, so teeny and tiny. Pop had a stool made for you so you can stand on it and reach the counter top.”
“I remember that. I still have stool in the shed.” She was keeping it just in case she could be lucky to someday share her love for cake with a little one of her own.
“The first thing you made were cookies. Chocolate chip cookies with oatmeal and peanuts and whatever else you can find in the pantry.” Eloise smiled at the memory. “You made it all by yourself with Ma standing guard making sure you don’t burn down the house, or worse yourself. And when it was done baking, you plated it up and gave it to me and said in your sweet voice, ‘I made cookies for you because I love you, momma’.” Her voice broke when she said the last sentence but she composed herself.
Eva didn’t know what to say. She didn’t remember that at all. She was so young that all her memories from that time were like water color paintings that have all blended together, beautiful but faded and undefined. Just like a swirl of colors, nothing specific. She cleared her throat. “I love you, mother.”
“I love you too, kiddo. And I’m sorry I left you behind.”
It might sound vague to a stranger, but Eva knew exactly what she meant. “You didn’t. I wanted to stay here.”
Eloise looked down at her lap, ashamed to admit it. “I wanted you to stay here, too. And I’m sorry for that.”
It was then that Eva realized she made that choice when she was thirteen years old because she didn’t want her mother to. She spared her that heartbreaking choice of leaving behind her only child to live in another state with her new husband. But things worked out in the end, right?
She reached over and held her mother’s hand. She squeezed it firmly. “We both made that choice. It worked out. I didn’t grow up to be a psychopath and you’re happily married.”
Eloise was silent again and Eva just leaned back on the couch and rested her head on her mother’s shoulder, still holding her hand. They both watched the cakes cool down, neither one saying a word but comfortable in the silence.